the braxton hicks hangover

The drop of a pin is too loud, the sun is too bright, and my WHOLE body hurts. Waking up less than four hours after an eventful night of braxton hicks with the screams of three highly energetic boys isn't the easiest thing to do. Their feet pound against the kitchen floor, and I don't know what happened but I swear their feet are louder. Like much much louder. The intensity of their voices has quadrupled by a million and their laughter has reached epic decibel proportions.

 Holy Moly.
 My boys are loud. Like really loud.

 To be completely truthful, the braxton hicks hangover has completely destroyed my ability to be a patient parent. I bite my tongue at regular frequencies to prevent the escape of yells from my mouth while the boys whisper in their bedroom.

 Do we really have to whisper soooooo loud??
 Yes.
Yes we do.

 And because I don't want to completely kill the joy of summer vacation with a roll of duct tape adhered to every one's face, I decided it was time to create a more quiet environment for moi. Sound proofed rooms sound amazing, but way-out-of-our-budget. Showers fail to kill the noise. And pillows wrapped around my head make life super inconvenient.

Lucky for me, my husband is a drummer with a secret stash of ear plugs.

 
Twisting these rubbery bad boys into my ears has been the best decision I have ever made.  You know, besides the decision I made to fill the entire grocery cart with organic ice pops instead of the regular grocery store staples during my last shopping trip.  But that is another story.

But hold on.
To prove that I am not completely irresponsible, I created these emergency communication charts.

and

Yep.
I am pretty sure that these two signs cover all the necessary bases.

The boys are pretty much in little-boys-can-be-loud-without-the-wrath-of-mom heaven.  Watching them stomp their feet, laugh, and wrestle across the family room floor is so much more enjoyable when muted.

One day - when the braxton hick hangover has disappeared - we will open our curtains and blinds and resume living a somewhat normal life once again.  But for now... life is so incredibly quiet and dark.  Hallelujah!

And in reference to my grocery cart full of organic ice pops?
I have decided that cooking is officially overrated and much too hot.
Who needs anything more than the goodness of water, fruit, and ice?

Every once in a while I toss the boys a piece of bread and they jump for it like fish.
Why-oh-why do we have to complicate life when we can get by with a organic-sugar-free ice pop and a piece of bread?  Why?